Fix yourself first. I had a twenty-five year relationship that was a house of cards. The illusion collapsed when he died and I had to deal with his other long term partner. Such a mess. You can find that story on Quora.

Needless to say, I went to therapy, for a while. It was the best money spent. I worked on myself for a few years. Worked through why I was with this person with a secret, old family issues, former work anger and trauma. Lots of anger and trauma.

I found a great fellow at the pool I swim at. (A great place to meet. Everyone is half naked.) this was three years later, I was comfortable and confident in myself. Being confident and comfortable with yourself can be hard work but, in the end you can see that for you you don’t need the trappings from a dated ROM/Com. I am not so sure they lived happily ever after in “Officer and a Gentleman”.